Just in time for those holiday parties - Horse and cow trivia

Have you ever attended a holiday gathering and been at a loss for words? It's your spouse's employee Christmas party or maybe its a family affair and you would much rather be at home watching "Its a Wonderful Life" than trying to make small talk. If this sounds like you, then this is the perfect time to stock your conversational arsenal with answers to that age old question "What's the difference between a horse and a cow?" for use at those impending soirees. After all, who doesn't like Horse and Cow trivia?

1. To begin with, cows can have horns or not while horses are strictly a non-horned animal. I realize that this is pretty obvious, but you never know what types your going to meet at these parties you'll be attending.

2. The tail of a horse is comprised of many long hairs that start from the base of the tail and grow to the ground. The cow's tail switch is long with a little tuft of hair on the end. Both are useful for keeping flies at bay. I can also tell you, from personal experience, that horses are especially adept at using their tail to whack any pesky human cleaning out their hooves. 

3. Horses have a uni-hoove (or single toe). Cows have cloven hooves with dewclaws. Humans should beware either variety because neither animal is very mindful as to where they place their feet and trying to push a 1000 lb. animal off of your foot is never an easy task (again personal experience).

4. Horses have incisors on the top and bottom of the mouth. A horse will grasp the grass tightly with his front teeth, close down and then jerk his head towards his front hooves snapping the blades off at the roots. A cow, on the other hand, has incisors only on the bottom of her mouth. After she grasps the grass, she jerks her head up and forward to break off the blades. Interestingly, the person who brought this fact to my attention was my dentist. In addition to running a successful dental practice, he is a cow rancher. Upon starting to dabble in cows, he had no idea they were totally without upper incisors. He only noticed a month later during his daily interactions with them. I had no problem pointing out to him the irony of his discovery. You would think that being a dentist would make him especially aware of teeth regardless of the mouth.

5. The hair of a horse slopes back toward the tail, while on the cow the hair slopes forward toward the head. In cold weather, you will see cows standing with their rump into the wind. If their hair grew backward, the wind would dig under it and give them a chill.

6. When horses raise up after laying down they lift their front end first. Cows lift their hind quarters first. I'm kind of biased, but I think the horse method is the more dignified of the two.

These are a few (but not all) of the differences between horses and cows. Now that you are armed with these interesting equine and bovine facts you are ready to head out into the seasonal party fray. Picture yourself dressed in your best holiday outfit, sipping a nice glass of Merlot, standing among your friends or coworkers and you drop this conversational gem "Did you know that cows do not have upper incisors?" You will be the life of the party.

HIDDEN GEM

7x5 inches, oil on linen canvas, 2015

THIS PAINTING FOR SALE AT AUCTION Click on this link to bid: http://ebay.to/1GkcXfG

Hidden Gem - auction ends on Sunday, November 15th at 9:00am PST. 

If you travel the backroad between Deception Pass State Park and the city of Anacortes, Washington you may spot this barn. Its obscured by some trees if you’re traveling northbound but if you turn around and back track you’ll catch a glimpse of its majestic beauty (that is, if you’re a barn geek like me).